Ingredients

1 gawky, insecure teenage girl

1 handsome young man

8 years of bliss

7 years of boredom

2 large measures of freedom

Enough booze to numb your feelings (to taste)

Add stimulants as needed

1 night in jail

1 recovering son

6 years of promotions

1 large period of depression

1 small decision to change

12 Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous

Directions

Mix teenage girl and handsome young man to make a little baby and form all into a family. Bake in 8 years of bliss and let cool for 7 years. Break family apart: painful but necessary. Add one large measure of freedom and a desire to live life the easier, softer way.

Using all the booze you can (or can’t) handle, and various stimulants as deemed necessary, blend at speed of “mach 5 with your hair on fire.” Let set one night in jail. Add recovering son to set an example. Smooth over with 6 years of promotions at work to create a desire for a better life. Then pour on the depression.

Whip it all together and at the lowest point, mix in a decision to change. Then add 5 years of Alcoholics Anonymous plus 12 Steps. Top it off with a second large measure of freedom.

All ingredients are optional except for the conscious desire to change and the 12 Step program of Alcoholics Anonymous. Prep time varies, depending on the amount of heat applied. Be aware the process cannot be forced, hurried, or short-cutted. It takes what it takes.

Yield

One woman, happy, joyous and free, with a new way of living and a life of serenity and peace. Same successful results experienced by millions around the world.